Sweetest Escape: Looking Back

"Just think of me as the pages in your diary"

- Alicia...

Just thought of that quote. I know I'm late but I just learnt of Alicia's homewrecking. Too too bad. Its sad what marriage has become these days. And the media is surely not helping.

But...

not gonna get into that tonight.

What I will get into though, is the idea of keeping a journal.

Maybe its a Pisces thing. I believe that I am a true Pisces: imaginative, sensitive, dreamer, compassionate.....

Lol, let me stop tooting my own horns. We have our flaws too, I just won't list them.

I started keeping a journal at age 10. Started on a boring saturday afternoon. I picked up an old notebook and just wrote. No plans, no agenda, just let the thoughts that were swimming in my head spill out onto the paper. I sat there writing for hours. At a point, i just started writing the conversation I was having with my sister.

"I hope you're not writing what I'm saying" - A

"Yup!" - Me

"Ugh! You are so annoying!" - A

"No I'm not..." -A

Something like that...

(Old School Pic #1: me. probably at age 10... I was so embarrassed when my sis took this pic but now I love it!)

And from there I kept going. I bought my first real diary (lock and key and all!) at a book fair in 5th grade. I absolutely loved it! I wrote all the time. Spilled my heart out. Told all my secrets. Never, ever, ever holding back. I kept it locked and hidden. But of course, it was found on various occasions and read by all sisters at a point (and even by a certain crush!)

Now, I just call it my journal. As I got older, I traded the fancy diaries for plain marble notebooks. The marble notebook made my journals seem less desirable. Meaning, if left it on a table, no one would have the urge to read.

I have a few journal traditions. One of them is signing off with the letters H.I.G.B (how's it gonna be). Cuz I write about fears and hopes and worries and happenings of my daily life. Then, months or years latter when I read back, I am able to answer my H.I.G.B question.

One of my favorite traditions that I love to share with others came from a novel I read when I was 13.

The book was called Memo to Myself When I Have a Teenage Kid by Carol Snyder. Basically a teenager reads her mother's diary. She then makes a list of things she wants to accomplish by a certain age.

With that as my inspiration, 13 I wrote my list of things I wanted to accomplish by 15 (number one on the list was probably to get a bf). I folded that page in my diary and vowed not to read it till my 15th birthday.

And on my 15th b-day, I was so excited to read back. A nice little gift to myself. Then, I made another list for 18. At 18 I made one for 21. And so on...

I decided to share with loved ones and allowed each of my sisters to write their own lists right in my diary. I also made a list for a guy I dated for a long period.

What I love about people I care about writing in my journal is that they completely forget about it. And so... three years later I bring out the list and its always tons of fun reading it out and watching the writer feel proud of their accomplishments and laugh at their fears...

(O.S Pic #2. me. probably age 13 or so. my fave outfit. tank top and skort!)

(O.S Pic #3. me. probably age 10/11ish. denim dress, headband and babysitters club book!)

So...

Now that I am 23, I am doing one for 25 (my 10 year anniversary!) and I encourage everyone to do one too!

Writing is so therapeutic and reading back is very inspiring! You re-awaken forgotten dreams and goals and you realize that every disappointment is a blessing!